Waiting... waiting... waiting...
We know we're going to have Munchkin through the summer and that's a blessing, but after September we have no idea what's going to happen. In a way I feel like I can rest easy at the moment knowing that, but at the same time its always in the back of my mind.
We're also moving toward adding to our family the "old fashioned" way. We'll see how that goes. I know so many couples that have struggled with infertility recently and it really breaks my heart. When we first started this foster/adopt process, I had some naive and judgmental feelings toward those who didn't want to consider adoption and only wanted biological kids, no matter how expensive the process became. Knowing now first hand how hard this CPS road is and how equally uncertain it can be, I can't look at these couples the same way and I want to apologize for my over zealous and ignorant opinions.
If you're morning the loss of a dream like having a child naturally, you're likely in no state of mind to jump into the world of CPS. You need to do some healing and grieving first before you even consider any form of adoption, all of which come with a certain level of risk and potential for heart break. You need to put your marriage first in this instance and make sure the two of you are really ready to move on, both of you. If you bring an at risk child into a grieving and unstable home... well, you can do the math. I'm not saying you shouldn't consider it, I'm just cautioning that you need to make sure you're both ready.
There is a lot of potential for change on our horizon. The possibility of a new baby or not, the possibility of another adoptive placement or not, the possibility that we'll get to keep Munchkin or not... So many variables, but one thing remains the same for us, our hope in Christ. He is our steady rock and our strength.
