We have our home study (description of us) submitted on several sibling groups now, all of which will be making their final selection for adoptive placements before the Christmas holidays, perhaps even before Thanksgiving. There are several possibilities before us. We could have none, one or two children. They range from ages 3 to 8 years old. We could have one boy, two boys, or one boy and one girl. They are comprised of a variety of ethnicities and hair care needs. As you can probably tell, I have a spread sheet of scenarios running through my head. Potential to do lists and shopping lists for every possible out come.
I'm a little giddy at the thought that this could be our first Christmas with our future kidos. I've been watching the Disney Chanel lately so I can see the toy commercials. Toys have changed! They've gotten cooler and cheesier all at the same time. I saw this remote control hover craft plane thing that I kind of want for myself. But what they've done to My Little Pony, Care Bears and Strawberry Short Cake is a tragedy! For shame, for shame!
Anyway... Again, here we are with the uncertainty. Its exciting, joyous, terrifying and nerve raking all at the same time. I'm normally not a huge fan of change, but God is changing my heart a bit. Change can be good and change requires that I trust him. Uncertainty requires that I trust him with the details and logistics. I have to hand over my lists and spread sheets. Its rather liberating to be honest. After my college study abroad experience where I was planning everything regarding my travel and accommodations, going on a vacation with my family where Mom and Dad had planned and paid for everything was a breath of fresh air. I could just sit back and enjoy the ride, and with my new perspective I really appreciated it. That's kind of how I feel at the moment. Just coasting in the back seat, trusting that my heavenly father has it all under control, and that its going to be breath taking.
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