Lots and Lots of Happy News!!

I just received word yesterday that both of Munchkin's parents have signed relinquishment papers!!  He's one step closer to being a Davis (on paper I mean, he's already ours in our hearts)!!

There's a 30 day window for relatives to appeal, and though its not very likely in our case, we still have to keep it in the back of our minds.  We got some updated information on how the timeline is going to play out now.  The case should be transferred to the adoption division in either January or February, and we should, in theory, be able to consummate the adoption in April or May after Jackson is born!  We might be done with everything by this summer...  I'm still wrapping my head around it.

I'm so proud of Munchkin's mom.  This had to have been an incredibly difficult decision.  We're taking a short trip this month and leaving Munchkin with my mom for a few days, and I was just feeling guilty for leaving him for just a long weekend.  I can't imagine how hard it would be to sign away your parental rights forever, even if you know its in his best interests.  She made a very difficult decision today and deserves to be commended for it.  She told his case worker that she really likes us, appreciates that we care about her too, and knows he's safe and loved with us.  She also told his case worker that she knows this isn't good bye forever, and is really appreciative of our willingness to do an open adoption.  I am so incredibly hopeful for her and I'm looking forward to building a friendship with her over the next 17 years.

Today is mine and Jeremy's 3rd wedding anniversary.  It seems like its been longer than that (in a good way).  I can't imagine my life without him in it, and trying to makes me cry (and probably would even if I wasn't pregnant and hormonal).  He is an amazing man after God's own heart, he loves me so well, he's a fantastic father, a wonderful husband, he works hard at everything he does, and I'm so proud to call him mine.  These three years have been quite an adventure.  Its been fun, happy, sad, stressful, exhausting, joyful, uncertain, up and down and all over the place.  I wouldn't want to do this life with anyone else.  My cup overflows.  I love you Sweetheart.

There's Something About November

Jeremy had a home visit with Munchkin's CPS case worker today.  The current plan is to either get relinquishment papers signed and submitted for the court hearing in January, or to terminate parental rights in February if they won't sign the relinquishment papers.  Then the case will be transferred to the adoption side of CPS and we'll have another status hearing four months from either relinquishment or termination, and then we'll process the adoption and consummate.  We're probably looking at close to a year before everything is final, but it feels like now its all just going through the process and we don't have to worry as much about losing him. (sigh)  It'll probably be around November of next year...  We got him November of last year...  November might be come a bit sentimental time for us in a lot of ways.

Another fun happening today...  We're getting a very temporary foster placement tonight.  Another new born straight from the NICU, little bitty guy.  Another family in our agency, who has the two older siblings already, and are planning to take this little man as well, just moved to a new house.  Until they get all of their paper work and license updated, they're operating under a temporary license with their current placements.  The catch is they can't take any new placements under the temporary license.  They should have all that worked out by Wednesday though, and we're going to keep the new baby until then.

It should make for a fun weekend.  We'll see how we fare with a toddler and an infant.  We'll see how Munchkin does as a big brother.  It'll be like a sweet little test run so we'll have a better idea what we're getting ourselves into in March when Jackson arrives.

Here's to a life of adventure.  :)  My heart is full and my God is good.

The Ball is Rolling

Ok, I've left you all hanging for a while...  The meeting that was supposed to happen a few weeks ago got postponed to this past Tuesday (11/4) for reasons I won't go into.  Because of some of the things that transpired in the past month after my last blog entry, we were not sure this meeting was going to go well at all.  Munchkin's case trajectory was definitely moving toward us adopting him, it was now just going to be a question as to whether or not Munchkin's mom was going to relinquish her rights or if they were going to have to go through the process of terminating her rights.

We still hoped that she would do the right thing for him on her own, and if she did, we'd still consider an open adoption.  Low and behold... she verbally made a beautifully self sacrificing and loving decision for her sweet baby and agreed to enter an open adoption with us.  We all cried and she cried and we all told her how proud we were of her.  What could have been a very ugly and heart breaking meeting, turned into something beautiful and full of hope.

Nothing is in writing yet, but the ball is rolling in the right direction.  If all goes well, though we don't have a time line yet, this could mean getting to officially adopt Munchkin much sooner than expected.

In other news...  We're having a Boy!  Jackson Asher Davis.  Munchkin is going to have a little brother.  We've already picked out his nursery decor, and I have some plans for Munchkin's room too.  :)  Now we just need to finish clearing out our spare room, do some painting, and save up to buy some of the things I've registered for.

Hopeful Anticipation

We took Munchkin to his trial hearing this last week.  Everything went as expected for the most part during the actual court proceedings, a six month extension was granted.  The events that happened before and after though, went better than expected.

We got to spend some quality time with his grandma and great grandma prior to his hearing.  They got to see how attached he is to my husband (I'm seriously chopped liver when he's around) and how loved he really is in our home.  They asked us, point blank, if we wanted to adopt Munchkin.  Of course we told them we did and that we would be more than willing to consider an open adoption if that was something that Munchkin's mom was willing to consider.  They were surprisingly interested in this possibility and proceeded to encourage his mom to consider it as an option as well.  Munchkin's case worker mentioned it to his mom's attorney and she was also very interested in the possibility and is now advising his mom to consider it.  It is by no means a done deal, but its now very much so on the table for discussion and consideration.  A routine meeting has been scheduled for next week that will include Munchkin's mom and her family, all the case workers and attorneys involved, and us, the foster family.  The possibility of an open adoption will likely be a major topic of discussion.  I'm on pins and needles!!

An open adoption has been our preferred outcome from the beginning.  We love this little guy and as I've expressed in previous blog entries, we have a heart for his young mother.  We want her to have an opportunity to overcome her situation and build a better life for herself.  Her chances of doing just that are much greater if she does not have to care and provide for a small child while trying to finish high school.  Please pray that we can come to a mutually beneficial agreement and that this dream can become a reality!  Its been so obvious that God's hand has been in this from the beginning and he's still in complete control.  No matter what happens next week, pray that we continue to hold on to that truth.

In other news...

We go week after next to find out if we're having a boy or a girl.  Jeremy is convinced its a girl.  We shall see...  I'm just really anxious to get to plan and shop and fill out our registry.  Having more than 8 hours notice before getting a baby delivered to your door is somewhat foreign to me...  I actually get to have everything I need ready and set up before the baby gets here this time!  And I have an estimated arrival date!  All new realities for the Davis house hold.

Munchkin's birthday is this month!!  We're having a small party for him with just family and a few friends.  The one year old birthday cake mess is going to be fun!!  Yet another photo opp that I can't share will you yet.  Hopefully I'll be able to soon though!

Its been a while...

Life has gotten a bit crazy...  hence the length of time between my last post and now.  I have a lot to catch you up on, but I'll do my best not to get long winded.

Well, Munchkin's case is still somewhat up in the air.  His lawyer and his attorney are truly fighting for his best interests, which they firmly believe to be for him to stay with us indefinitely.  His mom's attorney is fighting hard for her too though.  We have a trial hearing early next month and we'll see what happens.  The most likely outcome is that the judge will give his mom a 6 month extension.

Keep our Munchkin in your prayers please.  Pray that God give the judge wisdom and clarity to make the right decision and that God gives us the strength to accept what ever ruling he throws at us.  And pray for Munchkin's mom too.  We don't want her to get him back, but her situation is also really sad and difficult.  She's likely going to age out of the foster care system herself.  My prayer is that God gives her wisdom to do what's right for Munchkin, and that he gives her the desire and the strength to overcome her situation and make a better life for herself than the example she grew up in.

Mean while, Munchkin is doing awesome!  He's making the switch to table food from baby food.  He loves Mexican rice.  And he's starting to sleep through the night more (spoke a little too soon on this one...  drafted this last week and of course he started cutting two new teeth and all of that good sleep went out the window)!!!  He's almost walking, getting so so close.  We'll soon be having a birthday party for him before you know it.

Another new development is that I'm now 16 weeks pregnant!!!  I'm through the first trimester now, thank goodness.  It was a little rough, not gonna lie.  Had a bit of morning sickness (still having some and hopeing we're near the end of that) and one 3:00 am scare that landed me in the ER.  It turned out to be nothing serious, but it did mean that I couldn't pick up Munchkin for 2 weeks.  Let me tell you, being sick for 2 to 3 months straight and then not being able to pick up your child who's not walking yet, its not what I would call convenient.  And poor Jeremy was not mentally prepared for the toll that first trimester was going to take on me, or for the amount of work as a result that was going to fall on him temporarily.  I'm feeling much better now though (again, spoke too soon on this one...), except my appetite is still a bit hit or miss.  I'm a little concerned (for the first time ever in my entire life) that I'm not gaining enough weight.  Every check up and ultra sound has had healthy and normal results though, so praise God for that.

There's a slew of other changes that have taken place and are taking place in our lives.  Jeremy's accepted a new position at work that we're really excited about.  Our church just hired a new pastor.  Him and his wife are adorable, and we're really looking forward to getting to know them and their sweet family.  My mom retired from working in the church office and is now "full time" grandma...  I think that's most of it.

So until I get another spare minute to write an update, may God bless you and yours!!

Awkward, Sad and Inspiring All in One

I had an interesting new experience this weekend.  I went to a "matching picnic."  It was an event put on by some local service organizations for foster kids eligible for adoption and prospective adoptive families to mix and mingle over some games, activities and lunch.

We'll start with the awkward:

1. Flying solo - Jeremy was not able to get off work for the event so I was there alone and most of the adoptive families were represented as couples.  And I felt really odd trying to approach kids on my own to try to get to know them a little.

2. Inherent discomfort - It was like going to a mixer for singles except a whole lot more was a stake.  If you fear rejection from a potential significant other, just try to imagine how vulnerable these kids felt about the possibility of rejection from a potential mom or dad.  It was awkward on both sides.

Next we'll go to the sad:

1. The majority of the kids there were teenagers and pre-teens - Teenagers have such a hard time getting adopted.  At some point they are given the option to take themselves out of the running and just chose to age out of the system alone.  But these kids were still showing up, some less than a year from turning 18, to events like these in hopes that someone would want them.  It just broke my heart.  Made me want to change our objective and license parameters.  Jeremy and I have talked about it, and we do want to figure out how to adopt a teenager at some point, even if its not right now.

2. Preferential Treatment - The majority of the couples there looking to adopt were hovering over the the younger kids.  I ended up just hanging back and observing for the most part.  I refused to join in the competition for their attention and affection.  Little hearts and minds hung in the balance here, not to mention all of the teenagers also watching this obvious preferential treatment.

Lets wrap up the summation with inspiring:

While I was being my wall flower self, this young woman, not quite 17 years old, approached and engaged me (and many other couples) in conversation multiple times.  She was very purposeful, sweet, transparent and genuine.  She was a breath of fresh air in this room full of people with not so hidden agendas.  Among the couples on the prowl (they're doing something good, I know, that's just how it felt), oblivious youngsters, attention seeking pre-teens, and skeptical teenagers, she was a breath of fresh air.  I spoke with a few other couples and they felt the same way about her.

She shared her story with me, how she ended up in foster care and the way that has impacted her life to date.  She shared her goals and dreams and aspirations.  She plans to take full advantage of the financial assistance the state will provide for her college education.  She shared her reservations about and simultaneous hopes for an adoptive family for her and her younger sister.

We both admitted how awkward this whole thing really was for everyone.  I think it felt really good for both of us to say that out loud.

She asked me real questions about myself, like what I did for a living, where I went to college, what area I lived in, what age kids I was licensed for, if I currently had any kids, and if I was wanting to adopt.  Blew me away!  Won me over!  Made me want to take her home even though I feel way to young to be her mom!  I could see the disappointment in her face when I told her we were only licensed through age 10...

I left that afternoon questioning everything.  My stomach in knots.  What do I do with this?  What was the purpose of God crossing our paths?  I'm not sure what I was expecting to encounter at the picnic, but that wasn't it.

Jeremy and I are still processing and praying through this.  Right now we're moving forward with our current plans and asking God to make it really clear if he wants us to shift directions.  We are most definitely considering fostering/adopting teenagers later on when we have more parenting experience.  My fear is that we'll wear ourselves out and not follow through on that though.  We shall see I guess.  If you would keep us in your prayers.  Pray that we listen to God and follow his Spirit's direction as we navigate the world of CPS.

Jeremiah 29:11 - My Life Verse

I had a really hard time finding a title for this post.  I've been mulling over it for a few days now.  Jeremiah 29:11 pretty much sums up my life and its what I cling to when there are too many variables for me to plan in my OCD sort of way.  It seems appropriate today as well.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Jeremiah 29:11
New International Version (NIV)

Back in November we were told that we were "selected" as an adoptive placement for a sibling group of two, a 3 year old boy and a 6 year old girl.  Then a few days later we were told there had been a mistake and we were not actually selected, we had just made the short list (final four families).  Next there was a week of waiting to find out the final decision.  The morning we found out we were not selected was the morning of the day before Thanksgiving.  That afternoon we got the call for Munchkin needing a foster placement and we picked him up that night.  Complete devastation and hopelessness to adrenaline rush and joy all in less than 24 hours.

Fast forward 6 months...  Last Friday afternoon I got a call from our agency letting us know that the adoptive placement that had been selected for this sibling group had fallen through and wasn't going to work out after all and that they were taking home studies for these two again.  They wanted to know if we wanted to throw our names in the hat again.  I won't get into all of the reasons why it didn't work out with the other family, but rest assured, it was nothing scary enough to deter us.  So of course we said yes!  Even though we've never met these children and had not even seen a picture of them until last week, for a blip in time back in November, they were ours.

My heart is currently aching for them with sorrow over the hurtful situation they find themselves in, and with desire to bring them home if ours is the home God has planned for them.  The rejection of a family that is supposed to be your "forever family" as CPS calls it, has to be incredibly painful.

We also have our home study submitted on a few other single children at the moment.  Lots of things up in the air.  I've started an IKEA shopping list for each of them, because I'm a nut like that, and want to be prepared in some fashion for the many possible combinations and outcomes.  That and Pentrist curb my need to plan a bit.  If anyone is interested, we're trying to sell our pool table to make a little more room for kiddos.

And I'm still keeping to my goal of living in the moment and enjoying the in between!  Munchkin loved getting in the pool for his first swimming lesson!!  So much cuteness!  We have a fearless little dare devil on our hands! It kills me that I can't post a pic or video clip.

That's all I've got for now folks.  We'll keep you posted.